Run report 901: Don’t mention the Wolf – by Norma Stitts

…I may have mentioned it once but I think I got away with it….

The Wolf

The start of this Hash was all whispers about a wolf. Now, I thought people were talking about ‘the Wolf’, a german Hasher of repute who visited us at the Porquerolles many beers ago and then passed away on trail.

Luckily, not our trail as we’d still be filling in the ****ing paperwork!

No, this was a real wolf, a rumour of which had been spotted by Farty Bum and we weren’t to mention to Supermarket Trolley under ANY circumstances in case the Hash had to be abandoned, which after 31 years, would have been a shame.

Did I mention it was our 31st birthday?

Hurrah for us!

There was cake and champagne at the beer stop ! Hurrah for the Hares!

Lone Wolf

Procul joined us half way though the first half but it was actually more like half way though the r*n as the first half was a lot longer than the second in distance, but if you added the time waiting at the beer stop for the w*lkers then they were about the same length. In time. Not distance.

As I was saying, Procul surprised us by joining late, whereas he was due a down-down for arriving on time for some Hashes which was confusing.

Did the down-down for being early negate the down-down he was due for being late?. One for the RA to decide later.

Bad Wolf

The runners arrived at the beer stop but….no walkers! “Who cares” goes the typical cry at this point but… who had the keys to the beer car!! FartyBum!!!

Padre managed to open the door but set the alarm off… and didn’t access the beer!

We were forced to squeeze Levrette in through a small 4 foot gap obtained by opening the door again. It was a tough job but four hefty runners (there are runners on this Hash? – ed) managed to squeeze her in.

Keep up with the diet Levrette, its working!


Wolf of Wall Street

The Hares had warned us there would be some ‘up’ on this trail and for once, they were telling the truth. They also impressed us with their knowledge of non-Euclidean geometry by promising a 365 degree view from the Roman camp.

Sadly, there was only a stunning 360 view and no camp Romans. I could have stayed in bed! Said nobody.


The views were very impressive (which views! -ed) , as far as Bar sur Wolf with its remains of the old viaduct when ‘went on fire’ after the beginning of WW2.

Cumalot decided to film the 365 view while standing on a picnic table because he was not tall enough already… when a very rude rambler turned up from nowhere and said ‘Oi, I want to eat my lunch off that’.

How inconsiderate of her! Artiste at work!

Video available here


Wolf Whistle

It was international Women’s day just before the Hash, so lets hear it for those international women!

Wolfing it down-down

The circle was short in order to rush to the resto. There were down-downs, this is from memory so is all very unreliable…

Hares – Supermarket Trolley and Farty Bum

Buns – Animal endangerment, leaving Smudge’s lead to the mercy of the wolf rambler at the view point

Buns – not using Hash names

Hashy Birthday – Contessa, and the club!

Returners – Cumalot, Philppe, Philippes wife, Pedophil, Skinny A

Dogging – Farty Bum . see this handy reference

Cumalot – shortcutting, rambling on and many other offenses

Shit of the Week – Madame Mouton for not scaring the wolf away. Which seems harsh. Anyway, Farty Bum was an excellent substitute.

Padre – for talking about the Incredible Hulks areshole behind his back.

And being slightly serious for a moment, here is Incredible Hulk’s message all the way from the small town of Rēčtüm in Hungary.


It is too far to visit here, but for Info, Inc Hulk is having a Survival Hash this Sunday in Budapest. Five years all-clear from the Oncologist after colon cancer.

So you can nominate someone to do a DD for me in your circle 🙂 

Hopefully I will come visit in the next few weeks (need a business trip 🙂 

OnOn!!! IH

PS: Anyone who has not had a colonoscopy and is over about 50, should get one done! It is a life saver !!! -(and fun for all the family- ED)

Hungry like the wolf

The resto was another great find for the Hares. An tasty Indian meal in France? whatever next!! Its a good job we were a little late as the raucous Hash crowd managed to drive out the other patrons by their noisy chatter (was that just Levrette? – ed). To be fair, these patrons were even older than us, hard to believe I know…


Air Wolf

And finally…in tribute to Jan-Michael Vincent who passed away during the Hash (thankfully not on ours for the reasons given above) who when asked in an interview how he was…

“I’m a drunk,” Vincent is said to have responded. “I’ve always been a drunk and that is all I want to be.”

he could have been a hasher!

OnOn! to the next one.

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Riviera HAsh House harriers - BOOZY LUCY

Legal Waiver





“I am registering to participate in a hash event hosted by the Riviera Hash House Harriers. Activities associated with this event involve drinking alcoholic beverages, running, walking, climbing stairs and uneven surfaces, and prolonged enjoyment and festivities, which can at times involve substantial risk of injury, property damage, and other dangers associated with participation in the event. Dangers peculiar to such activities include, but are not limited to: hypothermia, drowning, broken bones, unwanted stains, strains, sprains, bruises, fecal trauma, concussion, feelings hurt, actual hurt, heart attack, cuts, abrasions, burns, electrical shock, disgust, poisoning, losing your sex partner, mopery, and blunt trauma. Inebriated participants also run the risk of incarceration, public shaming, tattooage, various forms of sexually-transmitted diseases, and unwanted pregnancy.”


The Riviera HHH reserves the right to refuse anyone from attending this event before and during the event for any reason. Actions that may result in being asked to leave the event include but are not limited to fraud, theft, fighting, sexual assault, causing damage to property, other illegal activities which affect others, or unwanted arseholery.


By accepting the Tc & Cs you agree this constitutes a legal signature and agree to all the statements on this page and the following statement:


”I have carefully read this RELEASE AND INDEMNITY AGREEMENT. By registering I waive all rights for legal and/or civil action against all person(s) participating in or organizing this event.  I hereby forfeit all rights to sue anyone associated with or connected to the participants in this event. I further attest that I am of legal drinking age and will consume no more alcoholic beverages than I can handle and will stop myself when I have consumed my personal limit. I am responsible if I break any laws or hurt anyone due to my behavior.”

Renonciation Juridique



“Je m’inscris pour participer à un événement de hachage organisé par les Riviera Hash House Harriers. Les activités associées à cet événement impliquent la consommation de boissons alcoolisées, la course, la marche, la montée d’escaliers et de surfaces inégales, ainsi qu’un plaisir et des festivités prolongés, qui peuvent parfois comporter des risques substantiels de blessures, de dommages matériels et d’autres dangers liés à la participation à l’événement. Les dangers propres à de telles activités comprennent, sans s’y limiter : l’hypothermie, la noyade, les os brisés, les taches indésirables, les foulures, les entorses, les contusions, les traumatismes fécaux, les commotions cérébrales, les blessures ressenties, les blessures réelles, les crises cardiaques, les coupures, les abrasions, les brûlures, les chocs électriques, le dégoût, l’empoisonnement, la perte du partenaire sexuel, la vadrouille et les traumatismes contondants. Les participants en état d’ébriété courent également le risque d’être incarcérés, de subir une honte publique, d’être tatoués, de contracter diverses formes de maladies sexuellement transmissibles et de subir une grossesse non désirée.”

Le Riviera HHH se réserve le droit de refuser à quiconque de participer à cet événement avant et pendant l’événement pour quelque raison que ce soit. Les actions qui peuvent entraîner une demande de quitter l’événement comprennent, sans s’y limiter, la fraude, le vol, les bagarres, les agressions sexuelles, les dommages matériels, d’autres activités illégales qui affectent les autres, ou le léchage de cul non désiré.

En acceptant les Tc & Cs, vous reconnaissez que cela constitue une signature légale et vous acceptez toutes les déclarations de cette page ainsi que la déclaration suivante :

“J’ai lu attentivement cet ACCORD DE DÉCHARGE ET D’INDEMNITÉ. En m’inscrivant, je renonce à tout droit d’action juridique et/ou civile contre toute(s) personne(s) participant à ou organisant cet événement. Par la présente, je renonce à tout droit de poursuite contre toute personne associée ou liée aux participants à cet événement. J’atteste également que j’ai l’âge légal pour boire et que je ne consommerai pas plus de boissons alcoolisées que je ne peux en supporter et que je m’arrêterai lorsque j’aurai consommé ma limite personnelle. Je suis responsable si j’enfreins des lois ou si je blesse quelqu’un en raison de mon comportement.”