Run report 901: Don’t mention the Wolf – by Norma Stitts

…I may have mentioned it once but I think I got away with it….

The Wolf

The start of this Hash was all whispers about a wolf. Now, I thought people were talking about ‘the Wolf’, a german Hasher of repute who visited us at the Porquerolles many beers ago and then passed away on trail.

Luckily, not our trail as we’d still be filling in the ****ing paperwork!

No, this was a real wolf, a rumour of which had been spotted by Farty Bum and we weren’t to mention to Supermarket Trolley under ANY circumstances in case the Hash had to be abandoned, which after 31 years, would have been a shame.

Did I mention it was our 31st birthday?

Hurrah for us!

There was cake and champagne at the beer stop ! Hurrah for the Hares!

Lone Wolf

Procul joined us half way though the first half but it was actually more like half way though the r*n as the first half was a lot longer than the second in distance, but if you added the time waiting at the beer stop for the w*lkers then they were about the same length. In time. Not distance.

As I was saying, Procul surprised us by joining late, whereas he was due a down-down for arriving on time for some Hashes which was confusing.

Did the down-down for being early negate the down-down he was due for being late?. One for the RA to decide later.

Bad Wolf

The runners arrived at the beer stop but….no walkers! “Who cares” goes the typical cry at this point but… who had the keys to the beer car!! FartyBum!!!

Padre managed to open the door but set the alarm off… and didn’t access the beer!

We were forced to squeeze Levrette in through a small 4 foot gap obtained by opening the door again. It was a tough job but four hefty runners (there are runners on this Hash? – ed) managed to squeeze her in.

Keep up with the diet Levrette, its working!


Wolf of Wall Street

The Hares had warned us there would be some ‘up’ on this trail and for once, they were telling the truth. They also impressed us with their knowledge of non-Euclidean geometry by promising a 365 degree view from the Roman camp.

Sadly, there was only a stunning 360 view and no camp Romans. I could have stayed in bed! Said nobody.


The views were very impressive (which views! -ed) , as far as Bar sur Wolf with its remains of the old viaduct when ‘went on fire’ after the beginning of WW2.

Cumalot decided to film the 365 view while standing on a picnic table because he was not tall enough already… when a very rude rambler turned up from nowhere and said ‘Oi, I want to eat my lunch off that’.

How inconsiderate of her! Artiste at work!

Video available here


Wolf Whistle

It was international Women’s day just before the Hash, so lets hear it for those international women!

Wolfing it down-down

The circle was short in order to rush to the resto. There were down-downs, this is from memory so is all very unreliable…

Hares – Supermarket Trolley and Farty Bum

Buns – Animal endangerment, leaving Smudge’s lead to the mercy of the wolf rambler at the view point

Buns – not using Hash names

Hashy Birthday – Contessa, and the club!

Returners – Cumalot, Philppe, Philippes wife, Pedophil, Skinny A

Dogging – Farty Bum . see this handy reference

Cumalot – shortcutting, rambling on and many other offenses

Shit of the Week – Madame Mouton for not scaring the wolf away. Which seems harsh. Anyway, Farty Bum was an excellent substitute.

Padre – for talking about the Incredible Hulks areshole behind his back.

And being slightly serious for a moment, here is Incredible Hulk’s message all the way from the small town of Rēčtüm in Hungary.


It is too far to visit here, but for Info, Inc Hulk is having a Survival Hash this Sunday in Budapest. Five years all-clear from the Oncologist after colon cancer.

So you can nominate someone to do a DD for me in your circle 🙂 

Hopefully I will come visit in the next few weeks (need a business trip 🙂 

OnOn!!! IH

PS: Anyone who has not had a colonoscopy and is over about 50, should get one done! It is a life saver !!! -(and fun for all the family- ED)

Hungry like the wolf

The resto was another great find for the Hares. An tasty Indian meal in France? whatever next!! Its a good job we were a little late as the raucous Hash crowd managed to drive out the other patrons by their noisy chatter (was that just Levrette? – ed). To be fair, these patrons were even older than us, hard to believe I know…


Air Wolf

And finally…in tribute to Jan-Michael Vincent who passed away during the Hash (thankfully not on ours for the reasons given above) who when asked in an interview how he was…

“I’m a drunk,” Vincent is said to have responded. “I’ve always been a drunk and that is all I want to be.”

he could have been a hasher!

OnOn! to the next one.

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Riviera HAsh House harriers - red dress run

Legal Waiver

I know that running is a potentially hazardous activity. I should not enter and run unless I am medically able. I agree to abide by any decision of an official relative to my ability to safely complete the run.

I hereby certify that I am in good health and I assume all risks associated with running/walking in this event including, but not limited to: falls, contact with other participants, the effects of weather, including high heat and/or humidity, traffic and the conditions of the road, all such risks being known and appreciated by me.

Having read this waiver and knowing these facts and in consideration of your accepting my entry into this event, I, for myself and anyone entitled to act on my behalf, waive and release the Riviera Hash House Harriers, its officers,  agents and volunteers, all states, cities, counties, trict Commission or other governmental bodies or locations in which events or segments of events are held, all sponsors, their representatives and successors, from all claims or liabilities of any kind arising out of my participation in this event even though that liability may arise out of negligence or carelessness on the part of the persons named in this waiver.

I grant permission to all of the foregoing to use any photographs, motion pictures, recordings, or any other record of this event for any legitimate purpose. I understand that bicycles, skateboards, roller skates and/or inline skates are not allowed in the event and I will abide by this policy. I also understand that baby joggers are discouraged for the safety of all participants. I am aware that the Foundation strongly discourages the use of personal audio devices (iPods and MP3 headsets).

Renonciation Juridique

Je sais que la course à pied est une activité potentiellement dangereuse. Je ne devrais pas entrer et courir à moins d’être médicalement capable. Je m’engage à respecter toute décision d’un officiel relative à ma capacité à terminer la course en toute sécurité.

Je certifie par la présente que je suis en bonne santé et j’assume tous les risques associés à la course / marche dans cet événement, y compris, mais sans s’y limiter: les chutes, le contact avec les autres participants, les effets des conditions météorologiques, y compris la chaleur et / ou l’humidité élevées, la circulation et les conditions de la route, tous ces risques étant connus et appréciés par moi.

Ayant lu cette renonciation et connaissant ces faits et compte tenu de votre acceptation de mon entrée dans cet événement, moi-même et toute personne autorisée à agir en mon nom, renonce et libère le Riviera Hash House Harriers, ses officiers, agents et bénévoles, tous États, villes, comtés, Commission trict ou autres organismes gouvernementaux ou lieux dans lesquels des événements ou des segments d’événements sont organisés, tous les sponsors, leurs représentants et successeurs, de toutes réclamations ou responsabilités de toute nature découlant de ma participation à cet événement même si cette responsabilité peut découler d’une négligence ou d’une négligence de la part des personnes nommées dans la présente renonciation.

J’autorise tout ce qui précède à utiliser des photographies, des films, des enregistrements ou tout autre enregistrement de cet événement à des fins légitimes. Je comprends que les vélos, les planches à roulettes, les patins à roulettes et / ou les patins à roues alignées ne sont pas autorisés pendant l’événement et je respecterai cette politique. Je comprends également que les joggeurs pour bébés sont découragés pour la sécurité de tous les participants. Je suis conscient que la Fondation décourage fortement l’utilisation d’appareils audio personnels (iPods et casques MP3).